Referendum I failed
on an emotional level
By Keith W. Swain,
DenverPost.com November 19, 2006
From the Web,
November 28, 2006
Humans are not hard-wired to be
logical. If we were, we'd be better at making rational decisions.
The classic physics dilemma comes to mind: I am standing in a field,
holding a gun in my left hand, loaded with one bullet, and holding an identical
bullet, not in a gun but just lying on my right hand's palm. If I were to
fire the gun and drop the other bullet at the same exact time, which would hit
the ground first?
Intuitively, most of us say the dropped bullet. After all, it has a short
route to travel, whereas the fired bullet could travel for hundreds of yards.
But our gut reaction in this case would be wrong. Both bullets would hit
the ground at the same time.
I believe the recent defeat of Referendum I, the domestic partnership question,
was decided in a similar way. Though most voters probably felt they
addressed the issue on a logical basis, the reality is that for most, positions
were decided on a gut reaction.
And it was that gut reaction, generally ignored by the leaders of the
pro-Referendum I group, which resulted in the defeat of Referendum I.
But who can blame the voters? The last time anything similar was on the
ballot, the notorious Amendment 2, the campaign was one of the nastiest ever
seen in Colorado politics, with heated, overwrought emotions on both sides.
This time, the leaders of Referendum I designed a campaign mantra, "This isn't
marriage, just basic civil rights," a slogan designed to stress the logical
statement of the referendum. And it was true. Referendum I was
clearly not gay marriage. But the voters reacted not to the plainly
obvious, but to their guts. And their guts said "no."
And there lies the flaw of the Referendum I campaign. Logical thought
versus gut emotions.
Take a look at the television ads from the two campaigns. On the
pro-Referendum I side, we saw a young man sitting outside an office, planning on
telling his boss that he was gay. The announcer says that he could be
fired for coming out as gay. His tone is somber, calm, implying that no
rational person would consider firing someone for simply being gay.
Though the makers of the ad probably thought it would trigger an emotional
reaction, I suspect those who were less open to the message simply thought, "Why
is he telling his boss he's gay?"
The other side used emotion beautifully. Their ad featured a photo album
loaded with romantic pictures: a wedding day, a baby's christening, birthday
parties. Who wouldn't have loved it?
Tying those warm feelings to an urge to vote "no" on Referendum I had a
powerfully clear message: "These special moments could all be gone if
Referendum I passes," a message that spoke to our deepest psyches.
So what is the answer? How do gay men and women help those who are unsure
about gay equality in Colorado "get it?"
We appeal to their emotions. Here's the ad I would have used.
Opening on a sweeping view of a Colorado ranch, we close in on a real Colorado
family: father, mother, sisters, brothers, grandkids, a dog and a horse.
(Yes, those families to exist.) "My family homesteaded this ranch and have
lived here for four generations," the father says. "We take care of our
own, and we follow the code of the West: Live and let live. When my
son came to me and said he was gay, I just didn't get it."
We then see old photos of the family's ranch life, such as cookouts, holidays,
and kids swimming in the ranch pond. The father continues. "But I
figure he's a grown man and knows what's best for him. But when others
treat him as 'less than,' that makes me mad. That's why every one of us
are out here in support of Referendum I. We're one big family, we take
care of our own, and no one deserves less."
Then, in that corny but classic way, the whole family shouts, "Yes on I!"
While some may be afraid of appearing manipulative, the truth is we humans enjoy
emotions. And the emotions on the pro-Referendum I side are no less
powerful, real or honest than those expressed by the opposition. In fact,
the whole point of this fictional commercial is to stress that we all, on both
sides, feel the same emotions -- love of family, respect for traditions, and a
shared hope for the future.
Gay men and women are not asking to be outside Colorado's values. They are
asking to be a part of them.
The lesson of Referendum I is this: No gay rights campaign can win the
minds of the Colorado electorate without winning their hearts first.
Dr. Keith W. Swain (DrKSwain@ hotmail.com) is a Denver
psychologist in private practice and a 2004 Colorado Voices columnist.
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