Anti-gay politics
will backfire with Hispanics
By Deb Price,
detnews.com from the Web, November 14, 2005
In the midst of popping the question,
Micki Gamez thought it only fair to warn the woman who'd won her heart that
she'd be marrying into a Hispanic family that is muy grande and very close knit.
"There are no such things as hotels in my family," says Micki, who married Ann
Nowaczewski in Canada last February.
True to Micki's light-hearted warning, a half-dozen relatives traveled from
Texas to Ferndale to celebrate the wedding. "Our place was packed," Micki
recalls.
Far from grudgingly accepting Micki's family and heritage, Ann is embracing
Latino culture and acting like the Latina by marriage that she is: She's
taking Spanish. She needs it to understand instructions from Micki's mom
and grandmother about how to make tortillas, tamales and enchiladas. "I am
not the cook," Micki says firmly.
The importance of big, extended families within the Hispanic community is
helping to make Hispanic Americans gay-friendly as more of them learn a relative
is gay. Micki says, "My family just has that love for me: 'You are
happy. You are in love. We will have to learn with you it is OK that
you are gay.'"
Adds Ann: "I am very accepted by Micki's family. They see that we
want the same things as straight people."
More than 105,000 gay couples are at least half Hispanic, census data show.
A study found strong similarities between those couples and married heterosexual
Hispanics. For example, 54 percent of lesbian Hispanic couples and 41
percent of male ones raise children under 18, compared with 70 percent of their
married counterparts.
Hispanic gay couples are much more likely than white gay couples to be parents.
Eager to join those ranks, Micki and Ann are choosing a Latino sperm donor.
Precisely because Hispanic gay couples are much like other Hispanics in terms of
children, education, homeownership and citizenship, they tend to be hurt more
than other gays by anti-gay discrimination. (See the National Gay and
Lesbian Task Force's report at
ngltf.org.)
If only one member of a gay couple is recognized as their children's legal
parent, their kids aren't eligible for Social Security survivor benefits if the
other parent dies. Similarly, U.S. immigration policy allows a citizen or
legal permanent resident to sponsor a spouse for permanent status as part of
"family unification," but gay couples are specifically excluded.
In one way, coupled Hispanic lesbians are unusual. They are six times more
likely than married heterosexual Latinas to have served in the military.
Long a pathway to a better economic life, the military boots out anyone honest
about being gay.
Fortunately, gay Hispanics can increasingly count on the Hispanic community to
oppose anti-gay bias. The Republican Party's efforts to woo Hispanics by
advocating a constitutional amendment to ban gay marriage is doomed to backfire.
Such major Hispanic groups as the National Hispanic Leadership Agenda and the
National Council of La Raza oppose that tactic.
Seventy percent of Latino voters want to protect those of us who're gay from job
and housing discrimination. And a majority of Latino voters under age 40
support opening marriage to gay couples, according to polling by the Human
Rights Campaign in July 2004.
In Hispanic families, like the one that includes both Micki and Ann, love opens
doors.
Reach Deb Price at (202) 662-8736 or
dprice@detnews.com.
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