It's time to end bias against gay soldiers
By Deb Price / The Detroit News from the Web, December 13, 2004
In a poignant letter to her ship's commander, the dedicated young Navy ensign described feeling ripped apart by the inherent contradiction between being forced to hide being gay and trying to live up to the military's and her own code of honor.
"I am a very poor liar and cannot keep half-stories and half-truths straight," Jenny Kopfstein wrote in July 2000 while aboard the cruiser U.S.S. Shiloh, which serves as a bodyguard for aircraft carriers.
"I have no desire to become a good liar either, and so I have tried desperately to avoid situations that might lead to personal questions."
The 25-year-old Naval Academy graduate continued, "I feel unable to even mention my dog or cat for fear the next question will be,
'Who takes care of them while you're gone?' ... I fear that even such a simple window into my life will lead to discovery of my sexual orientation."
She movingly described the burden of feeling completely isolated and feeling sickened that, as her ship's legal officer, she might one day be required to expel a crewmate for being gay.
And she told of being in the intolerable situation of hearing slurs ("comments about
'homos, fags, queers' ") that violated Navy policy but doing nothing to stop them for fear of triggering an investigation of herself.
Despite the federal law that requires gay Americans to be booted out of the military if they dare to be honest, Kopfstein continued to serve another two years, winning promotion to lieutenant.
And she stayed on the Shiloh as it was deployed in support of Operation Enduring Freedom.
Both captains under whom she served on the Shiloh recommended that the Navy keep her.
But in October 2002, she was discharged. The Navy and our country lost a smart, principled and highly trained officer.
Kopfstein is one of 12 gay soldiers who've asked a federal court to return them to uniform by overturning "Don't Ask, Don't Tell."
The 1993 law purports to allow gays to serve if they remain closeted and celibate.
The lawsuit details the outrageous mistreatment of gay Americans who've tried to serve our country honorably even though our country's treatment of them has been anything but honorable:
• Air Force Capt. Monica Hill, a doctor, was kicked out after asking for leave to care for her dying partner.
• Jennifer McGinn enlisted in reaction to the September 11 terror attacks.
During boot camp one night, the private says, a drill sergeant turned on the barracks lights and falsely accused her and a friend of kissing.
Saying homosexuality "makes me sick," the sergeant destroyed a promising military career.
The suit is filled with behavior that is against good order, morale and unit cohesion -- not by gay soldiers, against them.
(See www.sldn.org.)
• One Army sergeant told a closeted gay soldier, "If I ever found out someone in my crew was gay, I would kill him."
• Two top-ranked Air Force ROTC cadets were dismissed after falling in love -- something that would have been cheered had they been straight.
While lower federal courts have upheld the anti-gay ban in the past, the new challenge is promising:
It comes after the U.S. Supreme Court's sweeping 2003 Lawrence v. Texas ruling that gay Americans have constitutionally protected privacy rights, just like heterosexuals.
Also since 1993, more U.S. allies, including Britain, have lifted their bans.
Support for allowing "openly gay" soldiers has soared among Americans to 79 percent in 2003 from 57 percent in 1992, Gallup polling found.
And, in a huge breakthrough, a military appeals court on Nov. 30 overturned a heterosexual soldier's conviction for consensual oral sex, citing the Lawrence decision striking down state sodomy laws.
Everywhere U.S. troops are deployed, closeted gay Americans are putting their lives on the line for our country.
Certainly it's time for the rest of us -- civilians and military folks alike -- to stand up for them.
You can reach Deb Price at (202) 906-8205 or dprice@detnews.com
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